Virtual Weddings - Don't Say 'No' to Your 'I Do's' Yet
Will You Marry Me—Online?
I know what you’re thinking - “but, I’ve planned for this my whole life.”
“This is the day of my dreams.”
“What about our guests?”
“What am I supposed to do now?”
Well, couldn’t it still be the day of your dreams? Couldn’t it still be a day your remember and smile about for years to come?
Yes!
Did You Know?
Weddings one hundred years ago and even fifty years ago looked much different from the way they do today. In twenty years, they could change again.
In the 1940s, many men prepared to head off to war or those home on furlough made spontaneous decisions to get married. Their weddings took place within days of the proposal. Women didn’t have time to shop for a wedding gown. Some brides wore a simple skirt and blouse. If they wore veil it was fashioned from lace curtains. During this time, married men started to wear wedding rings to remember the wives that waited for them to return.
According to Bridal Guide capturing a wedding on video became a new trend in the 1980s. Destination weddings and eloping grew in popularity in the l990s. In the 2000s, couples opted to exchange their vows in hotels and reception halls instead of a house of worship. This decade, the 2020s, virtual weddings are happening. Couples are making the decision to stick to their original wedding date.
Choosing to stream your vows is not settling for less. Virtual weddings represent a new age. Any way you choose to pledge your love, the day you look into the eyes of the person you vow to spend the rest of your life with will always be a special day.
Social Media Poll
Conducting a simple poll to record opinions is always helpful when it comes to trends. For this blog, it made sense to conduct a virtual poll, so I reached out for the voice of the people via social media. During the first few hours of the poll, there were over 200 views and the gauge needle for the responses loitered in the space between 45 and 55 percent. Ultimately, the choice to postpone the wedding date edged over the option to exchange wedding vows online.
I wanted to dig a little deeper and a few participants provided insight for their vote.
Virtual:
A wedding is about you and the person you love. If you truly love the person, where and whom is there shouldn’t matter. - Rhonda De Souza Bisram
Postpone:
Because a wedding is an event where your families and friends unite. You can still handle the paperwork in advance, but virtual is not the kind of celebration I’d want. For me, it wouldn’t be a substitute! - Mimi Jackson
Virtual:
Nobody should allow anything to interrupt such an important day in their lives. Just like the Postman must deliver the mail no matter what; so we continue our lives no matter WHAT. If that’s the date they chose then that’s the date they marry. What’s more important the Union or the ceremony? - Ronnie J. Johnson
Thank you to all that participated in the poll.
Virtual Weddings and What You Need To Know
Keep in mind this practice is brand new and not yet allowed in every state. Do the research for your area and create a checklist to make sure you don’t miss any necessary steps. To give you a head start, I’ve provided some items for your checklist.
Virtual Wedding License - Getting a wedding license just got easier. Check the website for your state and learn how to apply for your wedding license online. Most wedding licenses are good for 60 days.
Guidelines for a Virtual Ceremony - While you’re on the website gather all the information you need before you plan your virtual ceremony.
Officiant Requirements - This varies from state to state. In New York, the officiant may perform the ceremony via the video platform of your choice. Check to see if it matters whether the officiant was ordained online?
Witnesses - While it is customary to have witnesses to the marriage, they are are not required in every state. They can be anyone, however witnesses are typically the maid of honor and the best man.
Marriage Certificate - This is the document that proves you are legally husband and wife. Be sure to obtain all required signatures and submit the form within the required timeframe for your state. Some states allow the couple to submit the signed document online.
Wedding Websites - The great thing is you don’t have to figure this all out on your own. There are several wedding websites that have expanded their services to help couples navigate through this trending option for the wedding world. Below are a few popular wedding planning sites.
Wedfuly Simply Eloped The Knot Zola
Ponder This
Advantages
You can expand your invitation list and invite that uncle or second cousin you struggled to keep off your list.
You don’t have to pay for a reception hall, cater for 150 people, or manage the costs of an open bar. However, you can get creative and send your guests the recipe for your signature drink and they can join you in a celebratory toast.
On some platforms, up to 1000 people can watch you elevate from Miss to Mrs.
You can get a smaller cake. Check with your local baker and see what their arrangements are for cake tasting.
Apply the money you save toward a down payment for your home, invest it or simply save it for a rainy day.
Can’t wait? Move your date.
Be the first in your family to have a virtual wedding.
Challenges
In my humble opinion, this is a very short list. The cons will vary from couple to couple. To some it may not feel as personal. Others may miss the hugs of friends and family. Sit down with your partner and really think this through. If the pros outweigh the cons what’s stopping you.
Virtual Weddings in the Media
Still not sure? Search ‘virtual weddings’ on the internet and you will see for yourself that couples are going ahead with their wedding plans. In fact, in New York City, since late April, over 3,000 appointments have been made to obtain a marriage license resulting in at least a four-month wait to get a license.
Vogue - Elaine Welteroth, journalist and best-selling author of the book, More Than Enough, and her now-husband, Jonathan Singletary took their vows on the stoop of their Brooklyn home.
200 guests celebrated their union virtually. A few friends, observed social distancing and formed a human aisle for the bride to walk through towards her groom.
https://www.vogue.com/slideshow/elaine-welteroth-jonathan-singletary-brooklyn-stoop-wedding
CNN - a New York couple tied the knot in the middle of the street as the officiant lead the ceremony from his fourth-floor apartment.
https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/21/us/new-york-couple-married-street-officiant-trnd/index.html
Your story is waiting to be told.
The After Party
Everyone loves a wedding reception. You can still have one, albeit virtual. Invite your guests to remain online after you’ve kissed. Hire a DJ and let your guests dance and celebrate with a few of your favorite songs. I recommend a DJ because streaming live bands can be tricky. Have fun!
On your first anniversary, you can invite your friends and family to celebrate with you all over again.
The Honeymoon
Once upon a time, newlyweds would steal away to Niagara Falls, Europe, or an exotic island. Over the last ten years or so, couples have waited a few days before they left for their honeymoon escape. Some couples celebrate a delayed honeymoon and travel months after their wedding date, for a variety of reason including financial or seasonal. I think you know where I’m going here. Enjoy your time together where you are. Have fun planning your future honeymoon and the rest of your lives together.
Congratulations and happy planning.
To Be Continued.
After days of research and writing this post, there is so much more I’d love to share with you. Stay tuned for Part Two in June.
Ciao for Now.